Thursday, March 24, 2005

Solitude.. in other words... Isolation!

Well, let's just say, after a long~ and what seemed like an everlasting solitude, in other words cocooning myself up and trying to keep everyone I know out of it - shutting myself completely down - I guess I got myself totally isolated from the world and the people I love and care for.

But then again, knowing me I guess the whole half of last year was my absolute break down period. And in a sense I think I did need that percise period to get over all the pressure and all the bad accidents that happened to me.

So, what's the matter? well, right now, I'm just happy that I'm regaining myself.

What happened during the times I did not write here, and why not write?
(I do ask that myself...)
I should have tried to just let it out and then let it work the rest.
And I know writing has been a good medicine for me.

I guess I was just tired of everything.

Isn't it funny when how everything seems to be so perfect and so good, it just hits you on the head and WHAM! you're just in a slump and everything just comes tumbling down on you?
Half of last year was exactly that.
Just when I was having a great time after the trip to Europe..
Trying to adjust to school life and ease down on the excitement.
I had the biggest disagreement with one of my professor and he wasn't helping much.

Then, I got into a car accident in November (I think it was November or was it end of October?).
To be exact, I hit an eighty-something year-old lady while I was backing out of my parking spot.
The funny thing is that I was paying more attention than I usually do.
The shock and fear, I don't think I could ever explain it.
I can still see her lying there.
and the blood.. damn the blood..
I think that's what frightened me the most.
Seeing her lying there and blood oozing out from the side of her temple...
Fortunately and thankfully she's out of the intensive care and doing okay.

And I've been doing okay since this year started..
and getting better..
Hopefully this year won't be as dramatic as the last.


  1. hey ara,

    i had no idea about all of this. i mean i know you had a rough time with the prof, and maybe you did mention the old lady incident, but i really didn't know it was that serious. I'm so sorry. I wish I could have been there for you more.


  2. It's okay~
    I was going to tell you but I just had to get it over it myself first you know how it is with me.
    But I'm feeling better.
    I'll tell you a cliche later..
    I guess I can't say i'm totally over it and i won't be.
    But I'm doing better so that's good =)
    Thank you for your thoughts and love.. and I know you're there for me no matter what! ^^